Its Official...

Confronted Adrian last nite... Or rather this morning... Talked and Cried, Cried and Talked... But one thing is clear... Adrian no longer have feelings for me... According to him, his feelings for me died even before they started going together... We finally decided that we can only be friends... Nothing more... So we officially broke up today, 6th Jan 2008... 5 Years, 9 Months, 26 Days...

I'm still staying at his place for now... Finding a place to stay first... Once that is found, we'll then let adrian's parents know... And i'll then move out... I guess i'll let my uncle and aunty know and see what they say... Since i'm staying hall for this sem, i hope my uncle allow me to put my stuffs at his place... Then i'll stay in hall 24/7...

Today we will be platonic friends... I guess when there is no emotional attachment, he is less stressful, and so he will treat me nicer... He actually hugged, kissed and asked me if i'll be here tonight... I said yeah~

He asked if i can be happy for him IF they actually got together... I said i'll try... But i know that i will be happy for him... Becoz when u truely love someone, all you wan is for the person to be happy... And since he can't be happy with me, i have no choice but to give him up...

Peili is still together with her bf... And i think i may jus go and talk to her one day if she is still undecisive... She has to make her choice man... It is unfair for both guys...

I may seem like a brave and strong gal... But deep down inside, I'm hurting badly... Really Badly... So much that i really feel like dying... End the misery once and for all... But i dun have the courage to do such a thing.

Adrian, if u are reading this, i wan u to know that my love for you has grown since that wierd proposal to be your gf... To a point that it is painful to let you go... I still love you even now and i'm not sure if i will ever be able to love someone else as much as i love you... You are one lucky guy to have such a nice family... Treasure them always and take care of them... I wish i had the chance to repay your family for all that they have done for me... I'm sure the chance will come one way or another... But for now, i wish u guys all the best. Love you all~

Walk One Step, Look One Step...